invincible

two blogs in one day. well, you really don't seem to care anymore. my ranking has dropped drastically,,i think that you rank basically everything above me, & that you do not have a spot reserved for me anymore. you once told me that you missed me and it was hard for you too. i believed it. but not anymore. I believed that i had a chance. and that the wait would finally be over. i was wrongg. you probably did not even think about giving me a chance. or probably gave yourself some reasons to not give me a chance. i can see it through your actions joanne. although you still "sign on" and "talk" to me. typing a few lines and not talking to me for 40 mins does not count ok..? & you are just playing games or . . . watching youtube. youtube i mean, you can still im me while watching videos online can't you? but you choose to not talk to me. my hope is gone. i saw your blog the other day. with the psychological fact: when a person cries and when the first drop of tears come from the right eye, it means HAPPINESS, but if the first drop of tears come from the left eye, it means PAIN. and i just found out that the statement is true. The first drop of my tears came from the left eye. I don't know what to do. Is it a sign telling me that I should just give up? since you don't even have a spot for me anymore...it hurts joanne its hurts. & i don't get how you can still live happily after you told me that you were sad too? i just don't get it. Its been almost an hour now, and you still haven't replied.. now i know...EVERYTHING > me. Now I know.